If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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