perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
