How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
