Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
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