it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Randomize
