Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
