There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize