Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
