Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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