I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I just saw a hot homeless man
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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