Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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