I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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