It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
