I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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