she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He? As in you personified your dick?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
