garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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