I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
