i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
