so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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