I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
