Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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