I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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