we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
