Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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