Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
