Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
