Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
