id be glad to
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
