my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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