Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
How does it feel to date your dad?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
