put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
