You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
how drunk are you?
Several
I came so hard my ears popped.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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