dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
