Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
You ruined the universe
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
