Its about making memories worth repressing
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
