For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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