im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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