can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
