yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize
