It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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