the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
