I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
