Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
