I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
