I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I don't deserve a penis
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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