she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
