its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
