I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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