rhymes with "ouble enetration"
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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