found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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